Michael 1996

MICHAEL (1996) is a 1996 American fantasy erotic drama thriller comedy western horror film directed by Nora Ephron. The film stars John Travolta as the Archangel Michael, who is sent to Earth to do various tasks, including shitting in the toilet. The cast also includes Andie MacDowell, William Hurt, Bob Hoskins, Joey Lauren Adams, and Robert Pastorelli as people.

The original music score was composed by Randart "Randy" Newman.

PLOT
800bc. A war is raging in Heaven, as the forces of Stan try to take it over. Michael, brandishing his big sword that he uses, takes down the evil forces, and is then sent to Heaven to help out on stuff.

The National Mirror is a tabloid publication that reports primarily on unexplainable phenomena. The editor, Vartan Malt, receives a story tip about a woman living with an angel in her house in a small town in Iowa, and decides to send three staff members to investigate. He chooses Frank Quinlan, Huey Driscoll, a photographer and owner of the Mirror star Sparky the Wonder Dog, and Dorothy Winters, hired by Malt to eventually replace Driscoll.

At the boarding house of Pansy Milbank, they meet her tenant Michael. While Michael has wings and smells like cookies, he has an unexpected taste for cigarettes and sugar, seems rather boorish at first, and does not appear clean. When pressed for the type of angel he is, he replies he is an archangel, with Pansy boasting he triumphed over Lucifer in the War in Heaven.

After Pansy unexpectedly dies, Frank and Huey decide to take Michael to Chicago. Michael reveals that this was his plan from the beginning. During the trip, Michael's mission on Earth is slowly revealed to be to get Frank and Dorothy together despite both having had bad experiences with love.

After Sparky is hit by a truck and killed, Michael brings him back to life. In the process, he uses up his allotment of miracles and begins to weaken. The group reaches Chicago just in time for Michael to see the Sears Tower (which he has always wanted to see) before disappearing. After Frank and Dorothy go their separate ways, Michael returns one more time (this time with Pansy in tow) and successfully gets Frank and Dorothy back together for good.

The story then moves to Whitby and concerns the evil sorcerer Reverend Big Puss O'Sullivan who is seeking two powerful amulets, called the Source, which he plans to use to control the users of online internet forum "ChapsTalk" and dominate the world. He purchases the first Source (which takes the form of a big ass) from a mercenary named Wetboots Kennedy.

He then uses the Source to destroy a ship upon which the next Source is prophesied to arrive, but when he surveys the wreckage he finds nothing but Pokémon cards.

The next day Michael, rejuvenated, arrives searching for the Source. He befriends the main character, Tugboat Morrison, and reveals that he is a messenger from God, and that Big Puss is a Shadowanker, a sorcerer who can control the dead by jerking his hog. Despite not believing in God, Tugboat agrees to assist Michael in regaining the Source because he wants revenge on Big Puss for evicting him and his dying mother from their home.

They pursue Big Puss and the Source with the assistance of Frank, Huey and Dorothy, as well as Sparky. They fall through a time hole created by Big Puss, who realizes the other Source is trapped in the 1800s.

In France, months later, Michael tries to steal a loaf of bread to feed his friends, but is immediately taken by the police and sentenced to five years in prison, which becomes 18 due to his numerous attempts at escape. After his sentence is served, he is turned away by everyone, with the only positive gesture being given to Randart "Randy" Newman, who convinces him to change his life. He then builds a new identity as Big Ass Stepdad, and becomes a successful industrialist. During these years, however, Big Puss has never stopped looking for the Source and Michael and constantly searches for them both. Michael reacts by attempting to flee, but first fulfills a promise he has made to Dorothy to have her Pie Song recorded and played on the radio. She is temporarily entrusted to Phil Spector who, despite the money received from Michael, refuses to record it unless Dorothy changes it to a song about cake.

Another time hole opens, and the gang fall through it.

In 2819 America, Big Puss crosses the border into Mexico in order to find the Source. He arrives at the ranch of a former lover, Big Ass Stepmom and her husband, the well-mannered Virginian drunkard and coward Nintendo Smith. Big Puss is determined to win back Big Ass Stepmom, as well as find the Source, having discovered it is hidden inside of Nintendo.

Nintendo, meanwhile, hires Michael, separated from Tugboat and the others to drive his herd to Texas. Michael accepts under condition he is able to drop a big one in every toilet on the way, but also tells Nintendo he will take his wife once the cattle drive is finished. Nintendo doesn't take him seriously.

Then idk something blows up and Big Puss is sent back in time and a dinosaur eats him. The end.

CAST

 * John Travolta as Michael/Tugboat (mo-cap)
 * Andie MacDowell as Dorothy Winters
 * William Hurt as Frank Quinlan
 * Bob Hoskins as Vartan Malt/Wetboots (mo-cap)
 * Robert Pastorelli as Huey Driscoll
 * Jean Stapleton as Pansy Milbank
 * Teri Garr as Judge Esther Newberg
 * Wallace Langham as Bruce Craddock
 * Joey Lauren Adams as Anita, Brown's waitress
 * Richard Schiff as Italian waiter/Nintendo (mo-cap)
 * Carla Gugino as Bride
 * Tom Hodges as Groom
 * Sparky as Himself
 * Lunk Bungus as Stan/Big Puss
 * Randart "Randy" Newman as himself
 * Phil Spector as himself